Sunday, February 9, 2014

Walls (100th Post Go Me!)

Sometimes in life, we decide we want to do things and stuff.

But while going down the merry path of things and stuff,

we run into walls.

The walls, being walls, stand in our way from going down the merry things and stuff path.

They're not usually very nice about it, either.

That is when we come to a point where we have to make a decision.

We can try and do something about this wall, or we can turn around and go back down the merry path of things and stuff and find a different things and different stuff path.

Often this is a difficult decision. I've chosen both before.

I once ran into a wall I've so aptly named "getting rejected to my dream school."

It made me sad.

But I decided to sit at the wall and work on my foundational art skills for a year. Then I turned back to the wall and tried to hurl myself over it.

I ran into it again. I was rejected the second time.

So I decided to get creative, since art school taught me about that shit.

I went to a different art school. And so I was back skipping down the merry path of becoming an artist.

Then I encountered another big wall. This wall was called "competence crisis."

It was a bitch of a wall.

I contemplated for awhile. I could try to overcome this wall, but because it was so big, I had no idea what would be on the other side. Perhaps even bigger walls.

And so I considered what would happen if I turned away.

This can be difficult, especially when you've put so much effort and time into going over the previous walls. It can be heart-breaking, too. However sometimes, you just have to be realistic about the outcomes. If I climbed this wall and became "the artist," or "the animator," I may be broke and forever in debt with no job security for the rest of my life, which could obstruct my abilities to explore other paths I wanted to see, like world travel, having a nice home, or having a family. I may be able to find great success on the other side, but with this I knew, again, I would also sacrifice my entire life.

And so I turned around and found other paths for myself.

It was a really, really difficult thing to do.

Maybe one day, I'll be able to find a new way around this wall. When I undoubtedly approach it in other realms, I will learn new tactics to deal with it.

Walls are just problems for us to solve. They challenge and test us, and our responsibility is to learn and grow from them.

But sometimes when we run into walls, they just topple right over us.

And crush us underneath their weight. We are trapped inside of them.

It just gets darker and darker as time goes on.


The end.

PS Sorry I can be so dramatic sometimes.


  1. I hit lots of walls. So many in fact, that I taught the horse to jump. Now the walls still come but getting over them is more fun x

    Great post- I love your art

  2. Your arts is most good in thz blog. U r a motherfucking bunny that give no fuck.

  3. Thanks for not having some uplifting story for this one. Sometimes being crushed under the wall is the only place to get any rest and in those moments "uplifting" is so annoying.