Saturday, June 21, 2014

Communications Class: A Lesson in Messing with your Professor

I know, I know. I've been denying you of your upmost blog reading joy of joys lately by not writing. I am buried under a huge pile of schoolwork that is mostly higher level math and science, plus working two jobs (all of the sudden!), and dating, and just being a general baller, you know, adored by millions of fans and loved by all. Just how I do.

Ok but seriously, calculus is murdering me.

The good news is I have one class that isn't intense science and math fun times, and that class is called Interpersonal Communication. It consists of no quizzes, no "required" reading, three pages of notes to glance at each week, a discussion to bullshit it up in every week, and the occasional assignment. It's literally the biggest waste of my time and tuition money. Hooray! But at least it isn't stressful.

The textbook cites nothing but pop culture references such as How I Met Your Mother and Shrek.
In my typical fashion, I decided I wouldn't let this class completely waste my AMAZING talents, and have decided it will be an exercise in creativity and of course my favorite, snarky writing.

Here is the latest assignment I turned in. Enjoy. 

Meredith Burgess
Interpersonal Communication
20 June 2014

Unit 2 Assignment- Self Concepts

According to the attached worksheet, the top five self concept items that I associate myself with are strong like bull, WWBD? (What would Batman do?), enlightened, Follower of the Almighty Toast, and Queen of the Moosicorns, in that specific order of importance. These self concepts truly define me as an individual for many reasons. Strong like bull takes first place because I am, by far, the strongest person I've ever known. Or at least in my household. Most of my friends are actually stronger than me, physically speaking, but it is difficult to be the strongest in a band of ultra-ninjas. I still consider myself pretty strong as, at least and if not more, a bull, and I use that strength a lot doing super cool ninja activities, so therefore, it takes the number one spot.

Runner up to the coveted first place spot is WWBD? Which stands for “What would Batman do?” Batman is my guiding light in life. He is my idol, my hero, and whatever other synonym one can come up with for those words. I try to act as Batman would, or in other words, I try to be as badass as possible. Otherwise what is the point in living? The third most important self concept definition for me is enlightened. As one may realize while reading this paper, I clearly have discovered the key to life. Living as a part of a band of ultra ninjas doing badass Batman-like super legit fitness lady stuff, I walk around on a daily basis with a glowing aura of golden light. My feet barely even brush the ground as I glide through the universe, one with “The Awesome.”

The last two spots are reserved for my religious duties. I am a Follower of the Almighty Toast, a deity greater than any other. I ceremoniously engage in toast activities every morning at breakfast time and pay homage to the Almighty Toast in many other ways. Currently I am writing a novel to help people gain awareness of the importance of toast in their lives. In addition to this, I am also Queen of the Moosicorns and more or less their human ambassador. The Moosicorn, if one is not aware, is a majestic beast that lives in the forest, half moose and half unicorn. It is the most badass of any beasts and rules the animal kingdom with an iron hoof. It is a rare sight to see one, but if spotted, keep distance and enjoying observing their beautiful rampage from afar.

My Jung Typology score is INFJ. In specific, I scored as 78% Introvert, 75% intuitive, 38% feeling, 11% judging. I think this very much relates to my self concepts and makes complete and total sense. The introvert makes immediate sense since Batman is a bit of a lone wolf, which of course is the route I obviously also take. Batman and I like to look to our inner selves for guidance and energy, that is how we get by. Also stated in the Human Metrics definition about the INFJ it says, “Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. Since in addition they often possess a strong personal charisma, INFJs are generally well-suited to the "inspirational" professions such as teaching (especially in higher education) and religious leadership” (Butt, 5). Religious leadership? Check. Self expression? Strong writing skills? Charisma? Well, this paper should be plenty of confirmation of that.

Works Cited
Butt, Joe, and Marina M. Heiss. "INFJ Description." INFJ Introverted INtuitive Feeling Judging. HumanMetrics, n.d. Web. 21 June 2014. <>.

Boy I hope I get an A!! 

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Stopping in at Work on a Lucky Goodwill Day

I've been working double hours the past three weeks, as it was technically my summer vacation and what better to do with my free time than work extra hard?  

Hey, I'm trying to make aerial dreams come true here, which as it turns out are not cheap. So lots of work it is!

Slippers always asks me if I have had the dream of endless piles of clothes crushing me yet, which I have not and I always laugh at him about it. I usually only work 3 days out of the week, because I'm still in school full time and trying to be legit pro dancer lady, so that takes up a lot of time too. Not to mention this blog and other various projects I have going on.

Just a regular two or three days worth of work

I have no idea how I could dream about piles of clothes crushing me. Incidentally this is an entirely different pile of shoes than the one above. 

Anyway, after working 5-6 days in a row for three weeks, I am kind of starting to see how having one of those dreams is possible. The work, as ideal as it is for me, kind of drags after a bit. The other day, in order to distract my brain from the monotony, I wrote this little poem while I was listing my 50th pair of shoes on eBay.
This is the pile of shoes to still be listed. Believe it or not this is when things are under control.

Whose room this is I think I know
Their real home is outside of here though
They won't see me sigh in despair
As I watch this room fill up with endless clothes 

That Fucking Cat must think it unfair
To find me always sitting in her chair
Between the clothes and other vintage crap
That I can't believe people pay to wear

TFC refuses to sit in my lap
While on the keyboard I tap
The only other sound's the peep
of NPR and Ira Glass

The piles are endless, tall, and deep
For I have work to do for cheap
And Levi's to list before I sleep
And Levi's to list before I sleep

It's true. Me and That Fucking Cat have had a strained relationship ever since she made Natasha Wang think I was a bed wetter. And now she hates me for stealing her napping chair. And torturing her by petting her fluffiness all the time. How evil of me. 

Seriously though. It never ends. 

Disclaimer: I do not actually think I work for cheap. It was just good for the rhyme (of which is another thing I am obviously really good at doing). I probably get paid way too much the perfect amount for the work I do. I am extremely appreciative of the job I have as I could not find a more flexible schedule and antisocial work. It's basically perfect for me. Also sometimes Viv feeds me leftovers or even gives me mixed drinks in the middle of the day and is the perfect role model, which is always my favorite thing. 

Also I totally could have drawn things but school has started up again and holy crap do you see how chaotic this stuff is? I'm FAR too lazy to be that detailed. It literally would have just been scribbles and maybe me making a weird frowny face. 

…I mean. That's what I usually draw. But this would have been especially lazy. I promise.